Well, that didn't take long. In dreams, as you probably know, when you turn and face a demon that's been chasing you, it immediately diminishes in size and threat, and that's that. Same thing here: I FACED FEAR, wrestled with it for a day or so and realized after a bit of a struggle that it was not a big deal at all. Fear is just something I don't have much experience with, it was only frightening because it was unfamiliar. As I wrestled, however, I very quickly got to know a lot about it. Here's what I learned:
- Yeah yeah yeah, one should face one's demons (see paragraph above), but that doesn't necessarily mean that demons are always something to be conquered, exactly. It was just my warrior upbringing that formed my context of how to deal with unknown, vaguely or even overtly threatening things: challenge them, and take them down; the Marine Corps instills in its recruits the mantra "Engage the enemy with overwhelming force and take away its will to fight." So that's what I've always done. Sometimes just facing them, as in the flight dreams, will do the trick; sometimes it requires a little bit of wrestling to get the point across mostly to oneself, that battle is not the only way to survive a contest. But, it's true: it begins and only ends with facing the demon.
- A spiritual mentor once told me that it's really a four-step process, neutralizing demons: a) name it; b) know it; c) accept it; and d) go on. Here we have big bad Fear, that's its name. I got to know it by sharing sweat and effortful wrestling with it -- it's not all that tough, but it is resilient and only endures if it is denied. Ignore it and it is always just at the edge of your peripheral vision, snapping and snarling, eating away your courage and resolve.
- Know it: know its properties, its power, its ratio of contagion, how it operates, how it can be used for temporal power. Also know its limitations, its weak spots. And know its usefulness. It's not as if Fear isn't a rational and reasonable response to life in this world; there are, God knows, plenty of things to be afraid of, and if one is a woman, factor that by millions. Fear is everywhere, and it should be. It does not, however, deserve to run anyone's life; if it is accepted as reasonable, rational, understandable, then it is acceptable in its existence. It's the most basic requisite to living in a world of sabre-toothed tigers, or a church full of Inquisitors, or uncontrolled Republicans. It's first chakra stuff: take care of the body first and foremost. Acknowledge it as it passes, and it always does, and it always will. It's part of life. Like cockroaches and maggots, which do serve a useful purpose at the same basic level.
- Accept it, that's the ticket. It won't go away; there will always be things that go bump in the night, ghosts in the closet and under your bed, things your friends have become frightened of that in turn, because of your desire to sympathize, even empathize, you take on as frightening to yourself. God knows the press is trying to scare you: it makes you hunger for more and more scary stuff in the news, and it's really trying to scare you into following its own agenda, which these days is mostly to vote Republicans into/out of office. Not a noble agenda, but one we can understand; we just have to remember that there IS an agenda in the press. There is always an agenda in fear-mongering, and once we find out what it is, it has no more power over us. See how this works?
The best always happens. It may not LOOK like the best at first blush, but it is -- it is the best for the greatest number, and it is the best that could happen to you. You don't have to like it right now, but it is
For.
The.
Best.
Always.
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